07 Dec HUMAN DESIGN – The Blueprint of Your Soul

I’ve been really enjoying an online offer that I want to talk about and share.

To answer your first question, no, I am not a paid affiliate. Also, it is no longer 50% off. But I would still highly encourage you to get it. The opening ceremony, alone, is worth the current price. Not to mention the value of what the 12 speakers share – where they are literally spilling all of their secrets for entrepreneurs. All things money and mindset + all the tips and tricks of the trade + a bonus as to how to navigate social media for marketing – even (or especially) if you have a smaller following.

Here’s the link to the Money Bootcamp: https://www.matriarch.love/confessions-bootcamp

I’m personally about 5 videos in – and soooooo much has already come through for me – and this is how the work happens. I guarantee that your take away and what comes up or through for you, will be vastly different.

“What do you mean, Mary? Isn’t the content be the same?”

Of course it is. But everything in this moment is aligning with who you are (in this moment).

Here are some of the things that came up for me – which will ultimately lead into me sharing about human design – the thing I am most geeking out on right now!

“Where your focus and attention goes – that’s where the energy flows.” By now we’ve all played and experimented with manifesting, haven’t we? And with this, we’ve probably learned a lot about the quantum realm, quantum physics, and about natural law. Like the law of attraction and the law of vibration – which are natural laws like gravity – what goes up, must come down. And we’ve all likely learned that most of this can’t be felt on a physical or mental level. It’s all about energy.

One of the speakers, or a few of them, spoke about being honest with ourselves about where we are in this moment. They talked about mindset, victimhood, and self-worth. They talked about how manifesting is active and not passive.

I’ve worked really hard in my life to overcome and heal any victim mentality that had taken root within my soul. And yet, with my current health struggles. it’s very easy to fall back into the poor me woes. And I try to allow myself the freedom to feel it all – in order to move through it. I also do my best to stay solution focused. Proactive versus reactive.

The next question that came (not through the course but in a book I’m reading on self-healing) was, “What is your illness feeding within you?”

So, I got real, raw, and honest with myself. While everything that came up was extremely personal, I will share at least one thing. My illness affords me excuses. Whew! I said it.

I am an introvert and need (and prefer) a lot of time to myself.

But let’s say I’m invited somewhere. I’ve found that if I answer, “No thank you,” I’m then asked other questions, like, “Really? Why?”  Which is usually followed by guilt coercion or someone trying to convince me why I need to go or do the thing.

And as someone who has struggled with codependency my entire life, I will often erase my boundaries and concede.

However, if when I’m invited, I simply explain, “Today is a high pain day and I’m not feeling well,” no one pushes further. And this isn’t to say that I lied. What I am saying is true – when I say this, I’m genuinely not feeling well enough to engage or participate.

However, each and every time I do this, I am activating the quantum field in confirmation of. “I am sick.”

Remember when I said, where our attention goes – energy flows?

Remember when I said, “Life is a spiral path?”

So, now I’m refocusing on boundary setting, honoring my truth, and also practicing, “No” being a complete answer.

And I’m still trying to figure out how to talk about my experience (because it’s exhausting and isolating – even if I am an introvert) and what I’m going through with my health is sometimes scary and sometimes I just need to feel seen and heard and understood. So how do we feel our feelings and share authentically without pushing our stuff onto someone else (emotional intelligence & maturity) and without feeding our illness more energy – while simultaneously working through it without bypassing? Anyone?

Also, I would like to take a moment and go on a mini rant about how many of us struggle with co-dependency.

Every time I think I may have boundary setting and have implemented actions, reactions, and a healthy mindset around not being codependent – BAM! – it suddenly shows up in some other way.

Until one day I seemed to have a deeper understanding on codependency and how it’s been weaved into the very fabric of society since the beginning of time. No wonder so many of us struggle with it!

When I was a child, I was taught manners and compliance. Do as I say – because I am the parent and you are the child. Do as I say because I am big and you are small. Do as I want and desire and you will be rewarded – be it praise or something else.

And when, or if, I would say “NO” as a child (because it actually comes very naturally to children – it’s a natural instinct – to speak their truth and honor their own boundaries), my parents would often ignore my no and tell me to do it anyway – and if I still refused – punishment often (well- almost always) followed.

So the message starts to become something like, “Do as I say, please me, and you will be rewarded and you are a good person.”

No – or worse- if you go against the grain – then equates and reaffirms the message, “You did not please me and punishment will follow. You are not a good person.”

Well, hello, unworthiness.

And this message just gets solidified over time through our education system and employment. As someone who worked in a corporate field and who climbed that ladder all the way up – another message that became very clear – you are replaceable.

Oh, you don’t want to work an 80 hour work week? You want to set boundaries? Ok – well you don’t have to work here and there are ten other people right behind you who would love your job. Meaning – if you don’t bring something extra to the table, you have no worth.

And now we’re seeing this play out in the real world and on social media, etc. Religion, albeism, sexism, racism, politics – if your beliefs put you somewhere outside of – well, let’s just say that cancel culture is real. Many say it’s a form of accountability. Yet, when we really look at the underlying message – it’s again, fall in line and be rewarded. Don’t and be punished. Because your thoughts, words, and beliefs have an impact and I (nor you, nor them)  should never, ever be put in a position where we feel upset or triggered. Right?

Doesn’t that all just seem really fucking codependent?

What about the part where we are human and flawed and how triggers teach us to grow? What about radical responsibility? What about contrast and duality? What about inspiring others and encouraging them to seek healing and growth? And is it really our job to continually please those around us – even if it means sacrificing ourselves on the altar of someone else’s beliefs?

I know most people believe our nation is built on capitalism but sometimes it definitely feels that socialism is just as important. Social Credit. The way we show up – not for ourselves – but for our neighbor.

Where do we draw the line?

I saw this come up a lot during covid and the discussions around the covid vaccines – and yes, I am fully vaccinated and boosted. But I wasn’t really sure how I felt about it. I had quite a few concerns as it was in an experimental stage with no data reporting. I wanted to protect myself and those around me. I didn’t want to have to find another doctor. And most of my friends were refusing to get vaccinated – but I was about to go on vacation and travel through and to Canada and it was a requirement. There were so many reasons I had to say yes – even though my heart was initially dead set on saying no.

During that time, I saw so many people berating and condemning those who didn’t immediately get vaccinated.

So again – it became – and was reaffirmed that it was not about honoring one’s self, medical autonomy, and one’s truth – it was about falling in line and doing as one was told – and if you didn’t – it was now your fault that others were getting sick and dying.

And here we are, two years later with Vaers and other data reporting that shows the dangers of the vaccines and it’s now being said that covid is no longer a “pandemic of the unvaccinated,” and that those who have been vaccinated or boosted made up 58% of deaths.

Whew! I got off track there – back to the money bootcamp.

Ok, where was I? So, the next thing that came up were a series of questions – how do I feel about money? This seemed easy enough to answer. I don’t have enough. I love it. I want more. Do you have friends or family who are wealthy? Yes, a couple. Who do you surround yourself with and who do you spend most of your time with? Most of my closest friends are either financially content (which doesn’t equate wealth) or are struggling creatives, like me, who are desperately trying to find a way to monetize their work.

And as I felt into this, I realized just how uncomfortable I am around wealthy people.

I wasn’t raised with money and learned early on to be grateful for what we have – “a roof over our heads and food in our mouths” – as though anything above and beyond that was just excess. I was also told to “take care of it because if you break it, we don’t have money to replace it.” More often than not, I was told we “can’t afford that,” – that money is the root of all evil and to clean my plate because children all over the world were starving.

I also grew up on hand-me-downs and way too much beans and rice (because, “it’s a complete protein”).

Any time I have been around someone who is considered wealthy, or went to their home, or out to dinner – I felt like I had to put on a persona or air about me. I wanted to fit in but never felt like I belonged – so I would act as if – but let’s be real – personas are exhausting.

This gifted me the opportunity to see that when I think of wealth, my subconscious is already being activated into negativity and the comfortability of being in scarcity – of being poor. Because if money equates personas, fakeness, airs, etc., then that ultimately means somewhere deep down, I feel quite comfortable, and feel like I can only be myself, when I am surrounded by scarcity.

Ouch.

And those are only a few of the examples of what came up for me within the money bootcamp container. I’m telling you – it’s packed full of all the things!

But, now, the part I’ve really been chomping at the bit to talk about. Human Design. Now I have had my human design, astrological, ayurvedic, and enneagram charts done – as well as learning my love language. However, I never really, fully understood my human design chart.

But this time, something clicked differently. I finally understood the information I was receiving.

What is Human Design? Much like astrological birth charts, Human Design is a system based on your exact time, date, and place of birth. However, this information doesn’t just map where the planets were in the sky when you were born like a birth chart. Human Design also identifies your dominant chakras to create your personal body graph. In other words – it’s YOUR OWN PERSONAL BLUEPRINT and when you fully understand it – I swear to you – it is life changing, life giving – and will empower you to live, work, and play in the ways that fuel you, feed you, nourish you, and inspire you.

I am a Generator 2/4.

And one of the biggest takeaways was learning that I am a responder. I am also a hermit and found that most people receive me as guarded – and guarded often equates untrustworthy.

Why is this important? Because when it comes to being an entrepreneur, there is a reason many of my offerings failed. Because I was trying to initiate. I created something I was inspired by and just sat back, passively, and wondering why the people and money wasn’t flowing in.

As a responder, I have to ask questions. I have to engage. As an untrustworthy hermit, I have to share authentically and intimately – vulnerably. I have to let people in and give them a chance and opportunity to know me.

When I create from the place of community and conversation, it’s likely going to be a success.

And since understanding this, I’ve now worked with four close friends on their human design – which I’m now convinced is the *magic* of unlocking our own personal blueprints to success.

For example, one of my friends is a Generator 6/2. She is a generator – so also needs to respond versus initiate. She is someone who is supposed to lead by example – and she is a hermit. For her to be successful in her sales, she has to show alignment – in that she does, she uses, she believes (sharing by example) and she has to be raw, honest, and vulnerable and engage in conversations. From there – the energy will flow.

I have a couple of friends who are Manifesting Generators 5/1. And I’m telling you – as soon as I broke it all down for them, light bulbs were going off and inspiration was instantly flowing.

This isn’t something I’m offering to the public, personally. But I really want to talk about it as I think it is the secret sauce to success. I would encourage you to do your research. You can find out your own Human Design chart HERE

Read books about Human Design, talk about it with others – get to intimately know your own design and blueprint – integrate, align, make the appropriate changes (to living and approach and everything in between) and I swear, you are going to feel the energy in the very fabric around you begin to change – and pulse with living magic.

Because it is magic. It’s YOUR magic. Most of us spend our lives seeking validation and wisdom and knowledge – outside of ourselves. Seeking and searching for the intangible touch of that divine spark – MAGIC. Understanding your Human Design allows you to understand it’s not outside of yourself. It’s within you. How expansive is it to know and believe that YOU are the MAGIC – to have that kind of confidence and belief within yourself. To understand that nothing is happening to you – rather, it’s responding. To know you are the magic and that everything outside of you is conspiring with you and creating opportunities to bring your magic to life – and not the other way around.